"Real" Golfer, By Peggy Faulk Ellender

"Real" Golfer"

I am a golfer, a "real" golfer,

With a desire to prove it so;

I'll obey the rules as taught to me,

And learn those I do not yet know.

I'll be kind and considerate to beginners,

A good example, I pledge to set;

And as a "real" golfer,

There are things I'll try to never forget.

Like: The marshals are the starters friends,

With only a job to do;

Therefore, I'll yield to their "on course rules",

As any "real" golfer will do.

I'll teach my slow playing buddies,

The art of keeping the pace;

I'll repair any ball mark I make,

Any divot I'll promptly replace.

I'll treat the pros in the pro shop,

With the proper respect of the day;

For it is they who have made possible,

This wonderful game that we play.

I'll count my strokes fairly and squarely,

No cheating, in any way;

For sand bagging is much like stealing,

And is sure to haunt you someday.

I'll observe the wonders of nature,

Protecting what the Lord has created;

I'll bask in each round He allows me,

And all blessings therein delegated.

I'll invite into my threesome,

Any single who straggles up;

And I'll never, ever use my putter,

To retrieve my ball from the cup.

I'll not drag my feet 'cross the greens,

Oh, what a mess that makes;

Or drive a cart onto par threes,

Never---for goodness sakes!

I promise not to hit into others,

It's a dangerous thing to do;

I beg you to refrain form doing that, also,

Would you like it done to you?

I'll remember that golf was designed,

To be a sporting, gentleman's game;

Pledging to conduct myself,

In a manner resembling the same.

Now, that I've been to the driving range,

And tested the practice green;

I'm ready to tee up my ball,

And see if I can get in eighteen.

So, with all of the above in mind,

The picture I'd like to portray;

Is an honest, considerate, consummate "real" golfer,

Even though it's not very well that I play.

written by :   Peggy Faulk Ellender